Welcome to 2016

Hi Darlings! Yep, its 2016 y'all, happy new year.
I had an incredible 2015, marked by sweet achievements, painful lessons and new found beautiful friendships. I really thank God for everything I went through in 2015 and its with immense gratitude and humility that I welcome 2016 with open arms.I also congratulate you reading this post, for making it too, to 2016.
 May we take conscious actions to make our live better this year, give more, listen more and love more.
God bless.
Love always,
Tongryang

Dark Post: God Reached Down for Me

Hi everyone! Hope you all are doing good like I am. It’s been a while again ,but this time, I have good reason.

Hmm! How do I even start this? Ok, Lets see how this goes. this could pass for a testimony or just a recount of a rescue from a dark experience, lol whatever that means.

 I entered 2015 with a lot of plans, ideas to execute and energy to fire me through. Then barely 9weeks into the year, I was really sick, had pile and anal fissure and doctors were talking operation. Hmm? On my anus? My parents and bros wouldn’t hear of it, but I was in so much pain I thought if cutting my anus open will relieve me of the pain, well so be it.

I totally removed God’s healing as an option, imagine? I probably didn’t even think of it. Hmm! But God, because He loves me soooo much, came through for me and took the pains away. So my health was restored, but I felt muddled up, removed from my plans and pretty much confused where to begin from again. I don’t know exactly why well besides being soo broke but I was depressed, wouldn’t go out, read, write, talk much or do the things that I usually enjoy doing. I even stopped going for the radio show I volunteer as a presenter on. I literally shut down.  I was confused and by confused, I mean I had no idea what I was doing or what I would do next.  I really couldn’t think, so I just lazy around, slept pretty much most of the time, and watched movies whenever I could drag my mind to. It was a terrible experience and trust me, I am doing a bad job describing what It.

All through though, there was a small part of me that wasn’t ok with what I was doing to myself, that doesn’t think because things aren’t working according to plan, I should just lock up, and that kept feeding me with positivity. Gradually I started listening to messages, talks and watching inspiring videos and I started feeling better.  

It was during some of those days I feel better that I wrote my last two- three posts. And somehow, it was just me talking to myself trying to pull me out of the fear, confusion, self-pity and whatever it was I was dealing with at that time.

While all of that was going on, God was orchestrating something special, pulling a dream I strategically place to happen in the future to happen. During that time of sheer bleak, God reached down and pulled me out and set me on a path of happiness. I will share the good news in my next post, be expectant.

Thanks for stopping by.

Love, always.

Peep Talk with Tongryang: Rise above Fear

Hi everyone! Hope you all had a great weekend and ready for a productive week ahead.

So today, I want to talk about fear and I hope this speaks to someone today.

Fear happens to the best of us. Fear is a scared little being that bullies into surrender its victims for fear of being killed by action. Yeah! Fear fears too.  It’s a false feeling of something gloomy looming to happen, if we dare take a step or action. I say its false because always, when you push yourself beyond that negative feeling and do what you are so afraid of, it turns out there was nothing really sinister waiting to happen. Photo credit: personalitytutor.com

Fear comes in different forms and in different degrees. There is fear of failure, fear of under achieving, fear of public speaking, fear of crowd, fear of success and a host of others.

For me, I had been severely short-changed by the fear of success. Yes, you heard right. I have always had incredible believe in myself and my ability to pull off any thing I set to achieve but, thing is, I would not allow myself, I was scared of succeeding, I was scared of all the changes and adjustment my life will take if I succeeded. It took a long time, a lot of efforts; unlearning and relearning to overcome that negativity.

You might be reading this, and you are at the verge of refusing to take on your dream for one fear or the other, darling listen, its ok to fear; acknowledge it even, but it’s unacceptable to buckle under it. Rise up, face fear and watch it diminish into nothingness.

Thanks for stopping by.

Love, always.

Tongryang.

What is Wrong with the World?

 Photo credit: madamenoire.com

What is wrong with the world? I don’t mean the earth that wombs us all, but the inhabitants of the world; the world’s people.
 
Why has life, which is sacred, suddenly become worthless? People killing each other on the flimsiest and the most mundane excuse?

Why have the world’s people suddenly feel a need to help God? I mean, to protect Him and expand for God? How silly can that be? Killing, for God?

How can some people even dare explain killing others because they feel threatened by their success as if the power to strive and create doesn’t reside in every one of us?
How can another’s struggle to survive even threaten you except you have a deeply rooted problem only you can solve?
What does xenophobia even mean? I mean I get the meaning, I just checked it again in 5 different dictionaries but I still don’t get why its enough reason to hack down, butcher and burn another.

I mean, I don’t even understand the anger, jealousy and hate that have elegantly found expression on social media. What was our world like again before Facebook, Twitter and Instagram? Where did this bitterness emerge from? I mean the one we direct at each other; bullying, tiring and dragging? How come we suddenly don’t know how to be happy with other, how to compliment and simply pour out love?

When did we lose our sense of humour? Why do we find it difficult to laugh? Has our lips all cracked, bleeding with deep wounds, we can’t afford to push it further? I mean, a deep throaty hearty laughter heals, it heals the soul.

When have we suddenly become ashamed to look at each other? Have we all suddenly become ugly, we are afraid to look at our ugliness? Since when did we begin to prefer desperately peering at our phones than to look at each other?

How did we come about accepting being ashamed of looking at each other but shameless in sharing our naked selves online and offline?

What happened to dignity of self? Self-value and respect for one another? Since when have women become comfortable birthing children for men not ready to do right by them? Since when has it even become acceptable, even fashionable?

Why are we not satisfied with ourselves anymore? Why do we desperately need to enlarge, enhance and retouch?

Since when did we begin to change our genitalia like the clothes we wear? So now, we can simply decide to change not just our orientation, preference but our sex?

When exactly did children, even babies become sexy? That an adult can even fathom, talk less go ahead and abuse them? Why did we even create the word paedophile? We seem to acknowledge, accept and partake in maiming our babies by simply using the word.

I mean what exactly has gone wrong with the world?

My head aches, my heart breaks whenever I contemplate finding answers to these questions and a lot more like them that won’t just let my pretty head be. Somebody got answers? Help me understand please. What is wrong with our world?

 

Thanks for stopping by.

Love, always.

Tongryang

 

Back to Normal

Hi everyone! Hope ya all are doing great like I am… Yeah! I believe so.

 It’s been a bit. Well, more than a bit actually, it’s been a long long time since I posted anything here and honestly, my excuses are just excuses and I won’t bore you with them.

So, a lot of water has passed under the bridge right? Yeah! If you are a Nigerian or live in Nigeria, you’d know a lot has happened.  

Firstly, the thick fog hovering over Nigeria prior to our general elections has cleared up and life has pretty much returned to normal. You know, prior to the elections, lots of Nigerians travelled back to their home states and practically placed their lives on hold, but thank God, things are returning to normal.

 Photo credit: risenetwork.org

 

Ok, let me give you gist, you know how before the elections, there were predictions and counter predictions of Nigeria splitting; dividing as a result of crisis that would erupt at the tail of the elections? Ehen! Then, I formed a prayer point: God disgrace and disappoint everyone that has predicted or that is planning evil against your country Nigeria. It was one of my major prayer points during my church’s 21 days prayer and fasting in January and boi! Did God answer me or not? My darlings, God chose to answer my prayers and he disgraced and disappointed those agents of doom wishing my country evil by granting us peaceful elections. Yes ke, I sell fish like that, taking all the credit for praying for  peaceful elections... Anyways, I am beyond happy with the outcome of the elections in Nigeria, as power has returned (if it ever belonged) to the masses. Nigerians came out en masse and voted, and their votes counted; that is the dawn of a new day.
Now, the process wasn’t totally free from hitches but it was above average and will certainly get better with time. For that, I am grateful.

So, away from election matters, a lot of you lovely people reached out to me, asking why I abandoned the blog again. Truth is, I really didn’t. Lots of things happened, I was even sick for a while but i am ok now and I just want to thank you all for reaching out during my absence.

I have being thinking of ideas to make the blog even better for your reading pleasure, so be expectant.

Thanks for stopping by.

Love, always.

Tongryang

 

Dairy of her Full-ish Life: Floated

I remember the way I felt after the break up drama- rejected, dejected and like a failure... I desperately wanted it to work. I wanted to prove to myself that I can make it work, but for where? I spoilt it. Oh! Wait a minute; did I say I spoilt it? Hell to the no! dude was blind. This is a recent development thou, my realising he is blind.  It’s a pretty recent development. I had blamed, tortured and hated myself for the all the while. I didn’t know where to draw the line, between taking responsibility for one’s action and outright self-blame.

 It was crazy, I was crazy. I floated by, taking note of nothing, letting go  of myself. 

Peep Talk with Tongryang: Thinking

 

 

Hi everyone! Hope you are doing well and having a great time?

 If this is your first time of visiting this blog, I’d say thank you for stopping by and welcome to my world. Here, I share my opinion about all things that concerns me not.
Today, I start the Peep Talk Series proper.

 The Peep Talk with Tongryang series is a platform where I get to share simple tips and information for people to utilize, to start living their dreams, identify life’s purpose and start-up businesses. I am all for living life to the fullest and this is my way of encouraging people to start living life as against just existing. It is actually a repeat of a segment I present on InnocentMinds Radio Show (a personal development show I co-host) in Jos.

So a listener contacted me on Facebook saying,” how can someone who does not know his purpose or who doesn’t have a dream but want to start something know what to do”… I told the person to start engaging in a mental activity that can direct, and give pointers. This mental activity is thinking.

 

Photo credit: www.shutterstock.com

 Yep! You heard read right. Just chill a little thou, because by thinking, I don’t mean worrying or randomly fantasying. Let me clarify-thinking is a mental activity aimed at getting understanding/ clarification. Worrying is tormenting self about a particular thing (my definition of course). So while thinking seeks to understand and solve, worrying seeks to indulge in self-pity.

HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU ARE THINKING

You know you are thinking when you seek to understand something that happened or happens with the aim of proffering solutions. For instance, you reside in a neighbourhood where all the females drop out of school at a particular age. Then you set out time and think about the possible cause(s) and what you can do to be different- to go ahead complete your studies and do something for yourself and community. You are thinking, when you constantly seek ways to proffer solution to problems, when you seek ideas to do things differently even in the midst of difficult situations and failing systems

HOW THINKING CAN BE A POINTER

Now, take note of what you are always thinking about, the area that your thoughts constantly tilt towards. When you sit and unconsciously start thinking about the same thing over and over again, It could be an indication of where your interest and where your life’s work lies.